Breaking Dawn EPOV
by phoenixdk
Summary: Read Edward go through the motions of Breaking Dawn, the joy of married life, the fear for Bella's life and the hate against the Volturi, when they once again threatens the Cullen family. With missing moments, including Isle Esme, all from Edwards pov
1. Engaged

**A/N: I don't own The Twilight Saga or it's characters, they all belong to the lovely Stephenie Meyer. I just play with them.**

**I am from Denmark, so even if English is like second nature to me, there can be some spelling or grammar mishaps. **

**Please enjoy my first venture into fan fiction.  
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**Breaking Dawn Edward POV**

**Chapter 1 ****Engaged**

I sat at my piano, composing a new melody to my wedding. _My wedding_. I can't believe I'm engaged to be married to my precious Bella. I couldn't keep the grin of my face, even if I tried. I was so proud that she had _finally_ agreed to be my wife, although not without a compromise. I frowned. I still couldn't wrap my mind around it. How was I supposed to have sex with Bella? I mean, I know the technical aspect of sex. God knows that's all the high school boy think about, so I know something even though I try to block it out. But how to do it with my very fragile human Bella was something else entirely. If only someone could tell me how to get ready to take that step, then maybe...

I trailed of when Esme came down the stairs. _Such a beautiful melody_ she thought at me.

"Hello son."

"Hi Esme, is Alice done with you?"

"Just about, she's making the final adjustments to my dress now. You haven't been peeking now, have you Edward?"

"No Esme, I wouldn't dream of doing that, especially when the pixie has promised to thoroughly dismember me if I even try."

"You bet your ass I will" came the answer from Alice.

"Alice, language" Esme said, just as I chuckled. Alice breezed down the stairs just then and I stopped playing so I could talk to the girls properly.

"Sorry Esme, I didn't mean to say that out loud."

"Just the same Alice, it's not very lady like." Alice had the decency to look guilty.

"What are you up to today pixie?"

"If you must ask Edward, I'm about to head to Seattle to talk to a floweriest and then I'll be heading to Bella's for a fitting."

"Do you know how long it will take at Bella's?"

"No I don't."

I raised my eyebrow skeptically, after all, she could see the future.

"All right, all right. I'll be done at Bella's a little after 3pm. And yes, she's going to come and stay the night here. You know, that problem you keep thinking back and forth about?"

"Which problem?"

_You know what, I won't say it out loud because first, __it's not something to talk about when there is a parent nearby, and second Carlisle could tell you something about it from a professional point of view._ "He is a doctor after all"

"Oh" was my genius answer. Of course, I could talk to Carlisle about anything. If anyone can help me, it's him. "Esme, where is Carlisle?"

"He's at the hospital dear. There was some paperwork he needed to finish. He should be there for a couple of hours. Do you need to talk to him?"

"Yes I do, will you call and tell him I'm on my way to see him? Bye mom and Alice."

I ran out the door and flew into my car and drew down the driveway before they could even answer. I hit the highway in just under 2 minutes and floored it. While I drove, I thought back to the day we told our families.

We had just told Charlie about our engagement, to say he was thrilled would be an overstatement, but he took it ok in the end, the only thing he had to say was, that we, or Bella really, should tell Renée. So Bella and I went out in the kitchen to call Renée about the news while Charlie sat in the living room feeling smug, judging by his thoughts._ There's no way she will agree to it, she has drilled in to Bella that marriage is not something one should when you are young. HA._ I had to admit, I was a little nervous, but only a little.

Bella was chewing her bottom lip while we waited for Renée to pick up the phone. She looked so cute when she did that, it was one of her endearing habits she had when she was nervous or feeling insecure. Finally Renée picked up the phone as I went to lean against the counter top.

"Hello?"

"Hi mom"

"Hi Bella how are you?"

"I-I-I'm fine" Bella stuttered and her heart rate picked up a little.

"Bella are you sure you're ok? You sound a little nervous."

I let out a snort. _A little_? Try a lot, she was beginning to sweat, it was highly amusing. Bella scowled at me and mouthed not funny.

"Well mom, I have some news."

What is it honey."

"Ehm..." was Bella's answer as her heart rate picked up yet again, I was beginning to get a little worried. I went over to her and put an arm around her, just as Charlie decided to join us. He leaned up against the doorway and looked on in open amusement. She took a deep breath and I kissed the top of her head as encouragement, closing my eyes breathed in the essence of my existence.

"M-m-mom, I'm m-m-marrying Edward" she choked out and then held her breath for the ax to fall._ Oh here it comes, Renée's going to be so angry now_ Charlie thought. And then the world turned upside down.

"Well Bella, I'm A little miffed that you waited so long to tell me. Plane tickets only get more expensive. Oooh, do you think Phil's cast will be of by then? It will spoil the pictures if he's not in a tux-"

"Back up a second mom," Bella gasped while gapping at me. Who would have thought Renée was this accepting to our news. I was beginning to feel a little giddy. Charlie on the other hand, was beginning to get confused. He couldn't understand what was going on, it was not the reaction he was expecting. "What do you mean, waited so long? I just got en-en...things settled, you know, today." I looked at Bella confused, couldn't she say the word engaged? I would have to ask her about it later.

"Today? Really? That _is_ a surprise. I assumed..." _WHAT_. My brain stopped functioning momentarily.

"What did you assume? _When_ did you assume?" Bella asked the million dollar question on both our minds, even though I couldn't hear hers, I could read it on her face. It clearly said explain please.

And Renée did just that. " Well, when you came to visit me in April, it looked like things were pretty much sewn up, if you know what I mean. You're not very hard to read, sweetie," you got that right. Well except for her mind, she is very easy to read when you know her well. But I hadn't picked anything up from Renée that she somehow knew, we would marry soon, when we came to Jacksonville, to escape Victoria. "But I didn't say anything because I knew it wouldn't do any good. You're exactly like Charlie. Once you make up your mind, there is no reasoning with you. Of course, exactly like Charlie, you stick by your decisions, too."

Bella looked like she was reeling. This went against anything she's been told and what she knew about her mother.

"You're not making my mistakes, Bella. You sound like you're scared silly, and I'm guessing it's because you're afraid of _me._ Of what I'm going to think," she giggled. Well she had a point. Bella was scared of Renée and I understood that. But Bella didn't look like she was scared anymore, her eyes was a big as saucers and locked on mine. She had just understood something Renée had said, but I don't know what. What wouldn't I give to see into her mind. _Oh no. No no no no. Not that...betrayer...see it in her face...my girl..._Charlie's thoughts hit me like a freight train, I couldn't make anything out of what he was thinking, like usually when he was stressed or emotionally, I could only pick out small things. But what I heard was enough to give me a little hope, and a tiny smile was beginning to tuck on the side of my mouth.

" And I know I've said a lot of things about marriage and stupidity - and I'm not taking it back - but you need to realize that those things specifically applied to _me_. You're a completely different person than I am. You make your own kind of mistakes, and I'm sure you'll have your share of regrets in life. But commitment was never your problem, sweetie. You have a better chance of making this work than most forty-year-olds I know. My little middle-aged child. Luckily, you seem to have found another old soul." She had no idea of how right she is, and I'm beginning to comprehend that she is accepting our early marriage. My smile slowly got bigger and I could see the corners of Bella's mouth beginning to turn up also. But she was still apprehensive.

"You're not...mad? you don't think I'm making a humongous mistake?" she said in disbelieve.

"Well, sure, I wish you'd wait a few more years," which is impossible. It's one of the things Bella didn't want. She had clearly stated that she didn't want to be more than 19, if I was to be a teenager forever, so would she. I could understand that to some extent, but I still wanted so much more for Bella. She would miss out on so much life, it still saddens me that she is so willing to throw it away like that, but I've accepted it. It doesn't mean I have to like it though. "I mean, do I look old enough to be a mother-in-law to you? Don't answer that," I actually chuckled at that and judging by Bella's amused expression, she was about to laugh to. "But this isn't about me. This is about you. Are you happy?" Please say yes, my love.

Bella's brow furrowed. _Oh ohh_, was all I could think. "I don't know. I'm having an out-of-body experience right now." Phew. So it wasn't about me. She was trying to figure out this new Renée, it wasn't how she expected her to react.

Renée chuckled at that and asked the most important questions. "Does he make you happy, Bella?"

"Yes, but-"

"Are you ever going to want anyone else?"

"No, but-"

"But what?"

"But aren't you going to say that I sound exactly like every other infatuated teenager since the dawn of time?" I had to admit I didn't understand Renée either at that time, but apparently she was turning a new leaf with the whole marriage thing.

"You've never been a teenager, sweetie. You know what's best for _you_."

"So you're fine with us getting married?" Everyone in the kitchen held their breath.

"Yes I am," Bella and I exhaled in relief while Charlie exhaled in defeat. He had practically counted on Renée to say no, but no such luck. I hugged Bella to me and kissed her forehead.

"Thanks mom, it means a lot to me and Edward, I have to hang up now so we can tell Edwards family the news. I have Alice call you with the wedding details."

"Alice? Edwards sister?"

"Yes. She's our wedding planner, she's the only one that knows beside you and dad."

"Ok honey. Have you sat a date yet?"

Bella looked into my eyes as she answered, "August 13."

"Well that was quick. Are you pregnant?" Bella looked positively mortified, and gave me a look that clearly said _I told you so_.

"No mom, we just want to be married before college."

"I had to ask. Have a good day, sweetie. And congratulations. Bye."

"Bye mom," Bella smiled as she hung up the phone and I picked her up and twirled her around, before stopping and giving her a kiss. Totally forgetting that Charlie was watching.

* * *

I smiled as I made my way into the hospital parking lot. I walked casually up to the desk station, the nurse that sat behind the desk looked up and immediately began to fantasize while a light flush rose to her cheeks. _My oh my, look at that body. Maybe I could talk him into coming with me to the changing rooms and get him naked so I could suck his-._ I immediately blocked her thoughts out trying my best not to show my distaste of her.

"Is Dr. Cullen in?" I asked as polite as I could.

"He certainly is," _I wish he was inside me. He is so hot, I've tried just about anything to get in his pants, but he loves his damn wife too much to notice_. "Who, may I ask, is seeking him?"

"Tell him, his son, Edward, is here to talk to him," _his son? Wow. If I hitch up with junior here, it's only a matter of time before I get yummy Cullen, maybe a threesome with farther and son. One inside me while I suck the other of...mhh I can practically feel them working on me._ I actually winced at that. _Disgusting_. I shaked it of so I could focus on what she was saying to me.

"Your farther is in his office, would you like me to show you the way?" she asked a little to hopeful. Her thoughts where getting more and more disgusting, not to mention impossible. Apparently she was also new to faculty because I haven't seen her here before.

"No that's fine. I know my way around here, my_ fiancé _is a frequent visitor at the ER. Maybe you know her? Bella Swan? The police chiefs daughter."

"No I don't know her. You can go right in. Have a nice day," she answered in a clipped tone. _It's all ways the good looking ones that gets taken first_. I nodded my thanks and headed for Carlisle's office.

_Hello son, I'll be done in a second_. "That's ok Carlisle, I just need to ask you something and get you advise." I was nervous, this was not something that I would be comfortable with asking. This was something way to private, but I needed the information he could give me. Besides, I would rather ask him than my brothers, they would only tease me. Well Emmet would tease me, Jasper would just boost him a little.

"Sounds serious. Are you ok? You look like you would rather pass out, than be here. What's the matter?" how do I even begin to answer that. True I do feel like I could pass out any second.

"Erm...As you know I'm getting married in a little over 3 weeks."

"Yes I know. I'm so happy for you, that you have finally found your mate. And Bella is such a gentle and lovely soul. But that is surely not why you are nervous, is it?"

"No, not at all. It's just that, after the wedding we would like to go on a honeymoon. A real honeymoon."

"Oh, you mean..." _you want to have sex on your honeymoon with Bella_.

"Yes, while she's still human. That's _the_ _one_ condition that she wanted, when she agreed to marry me. She wants that last human experience before I turn her."

"So your both virgins then?" If could blush I would have. I was completely mortified over the directness Carlisle asked _that_ question. All I could do was nod.

"And you want to know what it's like?" Again I nod. I cleared my throat, I don't know why, but it seemed like a good idea.

"Yes, I could use some information. I mean, I know the technical aspect of s-s-sex," why was I stuttering? "But it would be helpful if I know what to expect."

"Ah. As Bella is human, she is so much weaker then you not to mention fragile, so you have be careful as it could be very dangerous for her. I have faith in you, that you know your own strength and you use that to keep a hold on yourself. As you know with first penetration at girls, there will be a little blood," I nodded, but it wouldn't be a problem for me, not anymore. "It's a special thing, physical love, very powerful and it is not to be treated lightly. We vampires rarely change temperaments and strong emotions can alter us in permanent ways. But you don't need to worry about that, Bella has already changed you completely."

Yes my Bella has changed me in many ways. "Carlisle what would you suggest we do to prepare ourselves for this? We have different body temperatures and she is very fragile, next to me."

"I would suggest that you learn each others body's, so that you both know what to do and what not to do," he wasn't meaning- was he?

"You don't mean...," I trailed of, I couldn't bring myself to say it out loud.

"Mutual masturbation, yes. Edward, it's the only way I can think of that could help you. If your desperate you could all ways ask Tanya or the other Denali's."

I growled at the last comment, that would not happen. But the other thing I would have to ask Bella about.

"As for the temperature. Well that's not something we can do anything about. I would suggest that you go somewhere warm so it would be more comfortable for Bella. Hmm." Yes somewhere warm, tropical warmth would be the best, so the honeymoon would have to be in the south and it would have to be isolated _if_ something should happen. My head snapped up.

"Isle Esme," I breathed.

"Yes, it is the ideal place and it's isolated. So you'll have plenty of privacy. I'll talk to Esme about it when I get home." He glanced at his watch and thought, _I have a patient to attend to in a few minutes. Why don't you go home and talk to Bella about it, after all, it does concern her to. Maybe she has some ideas as to how to go about it, she does get some bright ideas from time to time_.

"Yes not to mention dangerous," I answered. He chuckled at that. "See you at home dad."

As I walked out to my car, I couldn't help but feel more at ease with myself. A major question had been answered that had bugged me since we told our families we were engaged. By the time I drove from the hospital I had a big smile on my face, when I thought about my family's reaction to the news.

Well the difficult part was over, I knew my family wouldn't be against this. I just hope that Alice hasn't told anyone yet, after all, when we left earlier to have some private time, Alice was yelling for Esme. As I drove up the winding path to my house, Bella's heart began to beat quicker.

"Relax love. You know they all love you, you don't have anything to worry about."

Bella let out a delicate snort, "Edward, I know they all love me, with the exception of Rosalie."

"Then why are you nervous? They are not going to protest about us getting married like we thought your mom and dad would. Sure they don't know we're engaged, well of course Alice knows, but the others are not sure we are yet." I was actually curios to know why. There was no reason to it that she should be. I know that Rose doesn't like her, but she's happy that I'm happy.

"You know why Edward. I hate being in the spotlight."

I let out a short laugh and then stopped when I saw Bella's furious expression. "Sorry love, I didn't mean to laugh at you. I know you hate it, but they love you and they won't embarrass you."

"I know they love me and I love them too. But I don't agree with you that they won't embarrass me, Emmet has made it a habit to all ways be there when I trip, or do something equally stupid. That or he points out something or make a comment that has me blushing to my roots."

As we drove up to the garage, I forgot that everyone was home and in hearing distance when I said, "I actually find your blush quite endearing and attractive, it shows that you mean what you say, even if it does embarrass you." The blush in her cheeks deepened and I couldn't resist leaning over and give her a kiss. The kiss stopped abruptly when Emmet's rather loud guffaws could be heard from the main house. Bella went deep red so fast that I thought all of her blood now was in her face.

_Come on Edward, you can kiss her later, I haven't said anything to Esme, just that I needed her help with planning a celebration at the end of summer. Please hurry up and get in here, Jasper has __already asked me too many times what there was up with me, since I am so exited_. A slow smile spread on my face on the news, that only Alice knew about our engagement.

"We'll be right in Alice. Come my love, let's talk to the family," I said in a normal voice, knowing the pixie and everyone inside could hear me.

We went to the house and I held the door open for Bella, like the perfect gentleman I was.

"Could everyone please come to the living room? Bella and I would like to tell you something," everyone was there in a blink of an eye, curiosity plain in their faces and their thoughts. Well except in Alice's.

I looked at my family before us and thought about just how right it was to have Bella included, she has tied our family together like never before.

"What is it son?" Carlisle asked.

"As you all know Bella and I love each other very much. Two days before the battle against Victoria and her newborn army, I proposed to Bella," the silence was deafening, both verbal and mental. And then everybody thought the same thing, _well?_. I let them wait a few moments while they anticipated the answer. _Come on brother dear, tell them or I will_. I looked sharply at Alice and shook my head.

"It gives me great pleasure to tell you all, that Bella has accepted."

Everyone let out yells at triumph and happiness, we got congratulated and asked when the wedding was to be.

"The wedding will take place here at august 13. Alice has graciously accepted to plan the wedding-" I was interrupted when there came a snort from Bella.

"_Graciously accepted?_" Bella asked incredulously. "More like demanded," when everybody looked questioning at Bella, she clarified. "She pulled the lost puppy dog trick, with big eyes and trembling lips."

Everyone laughed as Alice grumbled, "I wasn't that bad."

_Well if she _has_ to be in the family, I might as well be a little more receiving towards her_, Rose thought. _Hmm, now is as good time as any_. Carlisle thought made me look at him questioning. _The Cullen Crest, son_. I smiled, my Bella would be so glad to receive it and she would feel like she belong to the family, even if she wasn't a vampire...yet.

Carlisle breezed up to his office and back. "Bella, come here please." Bella walked over to Carlisle and he looked at her, the way a father would look at his daughter. "I have waited a long time to present this to you. I have given everyone in my family this. It gives me great pleasure to finally include you in my family." He handed Bella the small jewel box. We all had smiles on our faces and Alice was hopping up and down while holding her hands in front of her mouth, clearly happy, when Bella opened the box with her new necklace in it. "The Cullen Crest," she breathed in awe and enfolded Carlisle in a hug.

"Welcome to the family, my daughter."

* * *

I walked into the main house and knew immediately, that Bella was here because of her heartbeat. I could also smell the horrid stench of human food, hmm, she must be in the kitchen. She was there, munching on some light lunch, while Esme and Alice was pouring over some color schemes to the wedding. Bella looked pretty bored and like she would love to be anywhere then there.

I decided to rescue her, so I could talk to her privately. Alice let out a little annoyed sigh, that I doubt Bella could hear.

"Hello girls." Bella looked up so fast, that she might have had a whiplash. I walked over to her and cupped her cheek.

"Hey," she said softly and leaned in to my touch. I leaned forward and gave her a soft kiss to her sweet lips. Before I could deepen it, Alice cleared her voice loudly. I rested my forehead to Bella's for a couple of seconds and breathed in her heavenly scent deeply, before I went to stand behind her to enfold her in my arms, so she could continue to eat.

When she was done, we sat and cuddled in the love-seat in the living room. Alice and Esme had vanished to the old cottage in the woods, that would be our house away from the family, when we got back from the honeymoon and after her change.

I tried to muster up the courage to talk to Bella about the sex thing. I was so nervous about how she would take the fact, that I was even considering asking her about...

"Bella?" I asked hesitantly. She looked up at me and captured me with her deep chocolate-brown pools, that spoke volumes of her trust and love for me.

"I would like to talk to you about the honeymoon," she perked up a little.

"Have you found out where we're going?"

"Yes I have, but I'm not going to tell you. It's a secret."

"Oh," she said and looked confused.

"Well it's actually the wedding night I want to talk about," she was about to interrupt, when I continued. "I'm not backing out, but I would like to ask you about an idea I had, that can _maybe_ make it easier for me to be with you."

A slight blush was beginning to creep up her cheeks.

"What are you suggesting Edward?"

I fumbled with the words in my head, to try and make them into a sentence.

"Erm...it would be a great help to my self-control, if I knew how to touch you, without damaging you, while giving you pleasure," I finished rather embarrassing.

Bella's blush came on in full force, when it dawned on her what exactly I was asking her opinion on. Her eyes widened a little as she looked at me. "You mean..?" she asked quietly and ducked her head so her hair hid her face from me. A tell tale sign that she was embarrassed.

I tucked her hair behind her ear and turned her head so I could look at her.

"As I said, it _might_help. I'm not going to push you to anything you don't feel comfortable with. I just wanted to know what you think." I didn't want to tell that it was Carlisle that had said it would help. That would be to mortifying for her.

"So what you ask is, that you would like to..._practice_...being intimate with me, to better help you?" Practice? Huh. I guess that was a good word for it, without sounding harsh. I looked at Bella and nodded. She was quiet for a long time as she processed the information.

Then she looked back at me with determination in her eyes.

"Ok Edward. If we practice, I think it would be beneficial for the both of us."

I furrowed my brow. "How so?" I asked.

"We would both learn about each others bodies, not to mention we would find out what to do, and what not do. I think it could help us in the long run, if we know how we react to certainty...stuff," she finished of lamely and embarrassed.

I smiled and hugged her close to my side. It was getting dark outside.

"I should probably take you home now, love."

"No, Alice fixed it with Charlie that I would stay here to tomorrow. But don't worry, we won't be doing any practicing tonight. I would be uncomfortable and embarrassed knowing they can listen to _everything_ we do. Besides I don't want to give Emmet any more ammo for him to tease me about." Oh yeah, Alice said Bella would stay the night.

"That's ok. And I agree. This is something we should do when it is _only_ us." I wouldn't mention to her that I planned on doing some research on the subject, by asking my brothers about what to do. Something I _never_ thought I would do.


	2. Long Night

**A/N: I'm sorry my update on this story took so long, but I lost my twin brother in a car accident at the end of January and have not been up to writing so much. As I have mentioned in my profile I will be posting a new Harry Potter story that my brother and I was working on. It will be posted simultaneously with the Ginny Weasley books. On another note, if your interested in reading what Bella and Edward could do while "practicing" read jmolly's Unforeseen Events series.**

**Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Stephanie, I just borrow the characters.**

**Chapter 2 Long Night**

"I miss you already," Bella breathed.

"I don't need to leave. I can stay..."

"Mmm."

We were both breathing raggedly and Bella's heart was hammering against her chest. I could both hear it and feel it, against my naked chest. We were lying on her small bed after our dress rehearsal earlier this evening. When I had said 'goodbye' to her and Charlie, I had sneaked back in through her window, to be with her for a couple of more hours.

We had a standing agreement, that we wouldn't try anything tonight, but as soon as we were alone and Charlie was snoring, Bella and I were kissing passionately. It didn't take long for her to rid me of my shirt, not that I was complaining.

I kissed her down the throat and lingered at her pulse point, enjoying myself and completely ignoring my thirst for her blood.

I pulled away slowly and opened my eyes to look at the reason to my existence. My love, my life and my soul...Huh. I never believed that I had a soul since my change, but Bella keeps telling me that I have one, and now I can see it. It lies within her eyes. Her eyes opened and as our eyes locked with each other I could tell that she was thinking the same thing.

She pulled my head back down to her lovely mouth.

"Definitely staying, " I murmured.

"No, no. It's your bachelor party. You have to go," she told me, but her body told me a different thing. One hand went up into my tussled hair, and the other pressed tighter on my lower back so I had to stifle a groan of pleasure. What this woman did to me. I had to distract my hands, so they didn't do anything to spoil our wait, so I began to stoke her face to cool of a little. Then I remembered what she had just said and chuckled to quietly for her to hear.

"Bachelor parties are designed for those who are sad to see the passing of their single days. I couldn't be more eager to have mine behind me. So there's really no point," I reasoned. I had been waiting for her for 90 years, so I am more than happy to finally have her as my wife.

"True," she breathed against my throat and my senses was assailed by the essence of Bella. Heaven.

Suddenly I felt her hand on my chest, exploring slightly. It travelled down to my stomach and traced my muscles. I couldn't hide the shudder that rippled through me if I tried and in response I bent my head down and captured her lovely lips with mine in a searing kiss.

Just as I was sinking into it, Bella slipped her tongue past her lips and traced mine. I let out a sigh, both of excitement and of frustration. Why couldn't she understand that I thought it's too dangerous to frenchkiss? The venom and my teeth alone could kill her, not to mention that she often forgot to breathe when we kissed. I pulled away slightly, but Bella had other plans.

"Wait," she said as she hugged me closer and wrapped one of her legs around me. "Practice makes perfect."

I chuckled at that.

"Well, we should be fairly close to perfection by this point, then, shouldn't we? Have you slept at all in the last month?"

We had been 'practicing' a lot and it has all been educationally and not to mention fun. We have ideas and suggestions from various members of the family, and even tried to see a sex-ed film, but we were to mortified to watch it's full length. I should have known better than to trust Emmet to find one for us.

"But this is the dress rehearsal," Bella interrupted my inner monologue. " And we've only practiced certain scenes. It's no time for playing safe."

I froze. _Was she kidding me_? Everything we have done this past month, was to prepare us for it to be safer for the both of us later.

"Bella...," I whispered fully intent on talking some sense into her.

"Don't start this again, a deal is a deal."

I didn't know what to do. She was pressed against me in all the right places and I could feel my concentration slip away.

"I don't know. It's too hard to concentrate when your with me like this. I - I can't think straight. I won't be able to control myself. You'll get hurt." There's not much she would have to do to make me lose control. Her tongue for one thing. The other was something that both scarred me and aroused me. Sometimes when we were lost in our kissing and passion, she would bite my neck. It drove me insane with lust and I wanted nothing more than to bite her too, but I know that I can't do that yet. I just don't understand why it makes me feel that way, it's scares the hell out of me.

"I'll be fine." It was the automatic response she had to everything.

"Bella..." I wanted...No, I needed to explain the dangers she would put herself through, but of course, she chose that moment to interrupt me. Sometimes I wonder if she is a mind reader herself, because, she can almost always literally tell me, or anyone else, what they're thinking. I have even asked both Carlisle and Alice if they thought she would be a mind reader after her change, but Alice quickly shut that down. She said that Bella's mental silence would make that impossible, but whatever she could do would be powerful.

"Shh!" she told me and began to kiss me again. I kissed her back of course, but not as enthusiastically as before. I had to know she was completely sure of what she was about to do to herself, and those she loved.

"How are your feet?" I asked her. I had to start somewhere.

"Toasty warm," she replied with a smile. She had seen through me, I'm sure.

"Really? No second thoughts? It's not too late to change your mind."

"Are you trying to ditch me?" she asked jokingly with a little half smile.

I chuckled. "Just making sure. I don't want you to do anything you're not sure about."

"I'm sure about you. The rest I can live through."

I wondered if she knew what she had just said. The consequences of what that was about to happen would eventually hurt and sadden her. I knew it.

"Can you? I don't mean the wedding - which I am positive you will survive despite your qualms - but afterward...what about Renée, what about Charlie?" I knew Charlie would be devastated when he found out that Bella was dead. Our plan was to fake an accident of some sort, the details was still being discussed.

She sighed. She knew were this was going. "I'll miss them."

"Angela and Ben and Jessica and Mike, " I had to ask her about her best friends from school, even though I can't tolerate Jessica and Mike.

"I'll miss my friends, too" she smiled deviously in the darkness. "Especially Mike. Oh Mike! How will I go on?"

I growled. Very funny.

She laughed.

"Edward, we've been through this. I know it will be hard, but this is what I want. I want you, and I want you forever. One lifetime is simply not enough for me." As always, it made me happy whenever she told me that she chose me forever. But she is sacrificing so much, just to be like me.

"Frozen forever at eighteen," I whispered to her.

"Every woman's dream come true, " she said in a teasing tone. No it's not _every_ woman's dream. I just had to look at Rose.

"Never changing...never moving forward."

"What does that mean?" she asked. Ok, here goes nothing.

"Do you remember when we told Charlie we were getting married? And he thought you were...pregnant?"

"And he thought about shooting you. Admit it - for a second, he honestly considered it," she said with a laugh.

Yes it was something Charlie thought about, but it was for a lot longer than a second and more like our entire stay.

"What Edward?"

"I just wish...well, I wish that he'd been right." She would make such a wonderful mother.

"Gah," she gasped. I knew how she felt about it now, but in a few years it would be different. She would miss it and most likely hate me for it, because I took it away from her.

"More that there was some way that he _could_ have been. That we had that kind of potential. I hate taking that away from you too."

Silence was the only thing that greeted me after my statement.

"I know what I'm doing."

"How could you know that, Bella? Look at my mother, look at my sister. It's not as easy a sacrifice as you imagine."

"Esme and Rosalie get by just fine. If it's a problem later, we can do what Esme did - we'll adopt."

The only reason Esme gets by, is because she has us, but it still saddens her. But Rose is a different story. She thinks about it all the time. Yes, she gets to be beautiful forever, but she never gets to experience motherhood. It's the main reason she is against Bella becoming a vampire.

"It's not right! I don't want you to have to make sacrifices for me. I want to give you things, not take things away from you. I don't want to steal your future. If I were human-." I said fiercely and passionately. _I would want to farther your children_. I was about to continue, but she put her hand over my mouth.

"_You_ are my future. Now stop. No moping, or I'm calling your brothers to come and get you. Maybe you _need_ a bachelor party."

"I'm sorry. I am moping, aren't I? Must be the nerves."

"Are _your_ feet cold?"

"Not in that sense. I've been waiting a century to marry you, Miss Swan. The wedding ceremony is one thing I can't wait - " I broke off when I heard Emmett's rather loud thoughts. _Hey lover boy, times up. You don't get to knock the bed around till tomorrow. Besides, Alice kind of told us that, if we didn't come get you now, Bella wouldn't be walking straight and you would have a problem keeping your hands to yourself under the ceremony. I guess your first time will be a marathon, huh, Ed? I think that's fantastic. I have some suggestions to you. You could start with..._

"Oh, for the love of all that's holy!" I exclaimed. All these pictures he send at me.

"What's wrong?" Bella asked.

"You don't have to call my brothers. Apparently Emmet and Jasper are not going to let me bow out tonight." _We all have to hunt, Edward. We have to be well feed with all those humans around tomorrow. Alice told me you might want to ask me and Emmet some questions regarding certain things_, Jasper thought to me, while Bella hugged me closer to her. She knew that this was goodbye until the ceremony tomorrow. I could hear Emmett scale the house up to Bella's window.

"Have fun," she told me as she released me. _And now for some fun, just like Bella said_. Emmett thought. _Oh boy. He up to something, he's radiating mischief_, Jasper thought. Emmett ran his fingernails across the window, so a loud squealing noise could be heard. Bella shuddered, I imagine it wouldn't be the nicest thing to hear.

"If you don't send Edward out, we're coming in after him!" Emmett hissed trying to be menacing, but failing miserably with his silent laugh.

Bella laughed at his antics. "Go, _before_ they break my house." _Don't worry bro. I will leave the house breaking to you_. I rolled my eyes at the both of them, got up from my comfortable position in Bella's bed and put my shirt back on. I leaned down and kissed her forehead and breathed her in.

"Get to sleep. You've got a big day tomorrow."

"Thanks! That's sure to help me wind down." She said sarcastically.

"I'll meet you at the altar."

"I'll be the one in white," she said in a blasé tone with a smile on her lips.

"Very convincing," I said with a chuckle. I sank down in a crouch and sprang out the window, capturing Emmett unawares and send him face first into the ground.

"Oh, shit," he said.

"You better not make him late," Bella murmured to us.

_Maybe I should calm her down a little, so she can get some sleep_. I nodded at Jasper and watched him leap up to Bella's window and peer in.

"Don't worry, Bella. We'll get him home in plenty of time." Jasper send a wave of calm into her room, and I could hear her heart rate decelerate to normal.

"Jasper? What do vampires do for bachelor parties? You're not taking him to a strip club, are you?" _Now, why didn't I think of that_, Emmett thought just as he growled. "Don't tell her anything!" _Maybe we can hit the one in Seattle after our hunt_. I hit him on the back of his head and laughed to myself. There was no way Jasper or I would go to such a place.

"Relax," Jasper told her, but it was meant to us all judging by the wave of relaxation he send out. "We Cullens have our own version. Just a few mountain lions, a couple of grizzly bears. Pretty much an ordinary night out."

"Thanks, Jasper." He dropped down, and we all headed out to our favorite hunting grounds for bears.

I enjoyed running with my brothers, it was not a competition today, just running for fun. Jasper was soaking all of our feelings up and released them again so we got more exited and had more fun the whole time.

Suddenly we picked up the grizzly scent. We looked at each other and nodded in mutual understanding, then we changed the route so we could hunt grizzlies. The anticipation grew as we got closer to them. We jumped out in the open with a roar and we all started to fight with them. Emmett was having a ball, he had clearly got himself the biggest of them all.

I ducked one of the paws, jumped up on its back and sank my teeth into the neck. I drank deeply of the blood and savored the flavor. It wasn't my favorite, but a close second.

When we were all done with our kills, we cleaned up and hid the animals. We walked casually over to a rock formation to sit and relax a little.

We sat and talked about anything and everything, that was until Emmett decided to ask _the_ question I had trouble expressing.

"So Alice told us that you wanted to ask us something, and I guess it's about sex, since you know everything else then that." Jasper looked at Emmett with raised eyebrows, mentally shaking his head and debating whether or not to smack him on the head.

"What?" Emmett said totally clueless and looked at the both of us.

"Maybe Edward isn't as comfortable as you to express his insecurities and fears so openly," Jasper said pointedly. Emmett just shrugged, nothing ever fazed him, he was open about anything. I was going over everything I wanted to ask them, which wasn't much, but I had no idea where to start. I knew the biting thing was the most important issue to discuss, but how to begin.

"It's okay, Edward. Take your time, we're not meeting up with the rest of the family before you have talked to us and feel ready to head home." Jasper send a low calming wave in my direction. It helped me a little, but not much. I was to wound up.

"You're just saying that because you don't want to head back home yet to General Alice. You know, there's not a whole lot of stuff we have to do, just the driveway and the backyard." Emmett teased Jasper some more, but I tuned it out.

I was trying to clear my head of all the nerves and just ask them. They would know a lot about it, since they were both fairly active.

_Hmm...I wonder if we should distract him a little and tackle whatever issue he's having from a different angle._ I looked at Jasper and nodded slightly, it was a good idea.

"So where are you taking Bella on your honeymoon?" Jasper asked. I looked at him in confusion. _Alice hasn't told me. I know that except for me and Emmett, all of the family knows._

"Oh, that's a really good question. I'm thinking the bed, the kitchen, the shower and the couch to name a few", Emmett said while laughing. Jasper cuffed him in the back of his head.

"That's not what I meant, Emmett. I was thinking about the location, since Alice obviously doesn't trust us with that secret", Jasper exclaimed.

Both of them looked at me with anticipation, while I wondered why on earth Alice haven't told them.

"I'm taking her to Isle Esme. It's the perfect location. It's isolated, with no humans nearby and the heat alone should help with our different body temperatures".

Jasper was thinking about the strategic place and then nodded, when he couldn't find anything wrong. Should things go south during the honeymoon, we should be safe _if_ Bella needed to be changed.

"Can I ask you two about something? It's kind of personal and something I'm confused about", I might as well get it over with, both questions were kind of tied together.

Jasper nodded, but it seemed like Emmett just couldn't pass up an opportunity to tease me.

"I don't have to teach you how to best pleasure Bella, do I? I mean, you should know the basics with sex, if not more so, what with your mind reading. I know a lot of the guys from school think of nothing else, but if your if sure, I will be more than happy in educating you with all my memories of me and Rose together."

The onslaught of mental pictures were astounding. I fought hard to block them and by the looks of Jasper he was fighting to.

"Jesh, tone it down will you Emmett", Jasper glared at Emmett. Emmett just shrugged, but stopped all the same.

"I was wondering, now that you know where we're going, that you could tell me how to...where to first start...see, with Bella and I being virgins and she's my singer, I just..." I trailed of completely embarrassed and humiliated. I knew that there would be some blood and I know my control is good, but in the throes of passion, anything could happen.

"Ah" said Emmett. He knew better than anybody about the call of a singer, having killed both of his. Jasper understood just as well, he still had some troubles with his blood lust.

"I would recommend you start out in the water Edward, that way the small amount of blood will be washed away from the start and any discomfort Bella experience will not be too great," Jasper said.

"Yeah, and sex on the beach is where most want to lose their virginity, it's supposed to be very romantic, or so Rose tells me," Emmett said.

I nodded to what Jasper said and completely ignored Emmett's comment. It would be very good for the both of us to start in the water, then we wouldn't be so nervous, especially if we started swimming first. We would arrive at night, so the water temperature would be perfect.

Ok, question answered. On to the next one.

"Thank you. There's something else. When Bella and I are kissing passionately and stuff, she sometimes bite me and all I want to do when she does is bite back. Is that normal?"

"Bella bites you? Wow, she going to be a feisty newborn if she's already doing that. I knew she was meant to be a vampire, she's just to cool to be anything else," Emmett said in a surprised and eager voice. Both of Jasper's eyebrow shot up.

"It's normal for mates to bite each other during sex, to mark them so everybody else can see that he or she belongs to the vampire. You have to be careful of your teeth until she's changed and you might want to talk to Bella about this, before you consummate, so she's a bit more alert. I doubt it helps since it's instinctual, but you have make her aware of it. Like Emmett said, she truly is destined to be a vampire if she's trying to mark you already as hers," Jasper said.

Well that was some information that I didn't know and now had to consider into my careful planning. Jasper and Emmett continued to explain about what to expect while I sat and gathered my thoughts about all I have been told.

Dawn broke over the horizon and also broke me out of my thoughts. Jasper and Emmett was talking and play fighting amongst themselves and I decided to join them for one round and then hunt some more before heading home and help with the last stuff.

While we were running, only a single thought was on my mind. I'm getting married today.


End file.
